t-minus 7 weeks

I haven’t written in a while and it’s because I haven’t really buckled down like I thought I would.  😦

I haven’t hit that cardio goal.  At all.  I’ve walked the lake by my house once since the beginning of May.  My mom was in town for a week so no gym time/lake time/Bar time was made.  I realize that I should’ve just made it a priority, but I didn’t.  It was gorgeous while she was here and it seemed like we were busy every day doing something.  The day after she left, the temperature dropped 40* and it hasn’t stopped raining.  (we’ve hit the month’s accumulation in just 2 days).  No lake for me.  And I just dread the gym.  I’m still keeping up the Bar though – I will make it 3 times this week and will probably go 4 times next week.

As for food, I had a couple days that I flubbed.   I had a little rice.  I had a baked potato.  I had some brownies.  (Not all on the same day.)  And I’m finding it really hard to get back on track again!

Each meal is a decision and this week I’ve made some great decisions.  I’ve also decided to have a chocolate bar.  I’d like to tell you it was a 98% dark chocolate bar, but it was not.  Milk chocolate all the way.  I just can’t do the dark chocolate.

Maybe it’s the addition of fruit to my diet that has made me crave sugar all the more.  More than the sugar, I feel like I’ve been consumed with eating “right” that I soon feel deprived and make “wrong” choices.  I really don’t want to care that much about what I’m eating.  Protein + veg.  How hard is that?  I get the whole gluten thing.  I get the no grains.  And I get that I feel deprived.  Just sayin.

I think I will go back to the Saturday Free Day – have a day of the week where I can eat whatever I want.  No deprivation.  And maybe knowing that I can have whatever I want will help me stay “good” during the week.

It is t-minus 7 weeks til my birthday and I CAN buckle down and be “good” and see results by then.


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Carsten
    May 13, 2011 @ 00:24:59

    Well, I thought a lot about why I feel bad when I cheated on my own plans a lot. Why is it that we feel bad *after* we ate chocolate or the grains? Then it’s already too late. So you shouldn’t give yourself a hard time about it (at least not too much). It’s better to think about *what* made you cheat in the first place.

    You said, you should’ve made the gym time a priority even with your mom around. Why didn’t you made it? Did you ask her if she can handle herself for one hour (that’s the longest time I’d spend in the gym) or did you just assume that she’d be pissed when you leave?

    And with the fruit: I noticed that when I started to eat sugary stuff, I can’t stop. Therefore I don’t do full cheat days anymore. If you notice that fruit will start the downward slope, don’t buy fruits.

    Anyways, I just want to say don’t look back for too long. Adjust your decision paths and route around the trigger points to avoid doing the same things over and over.


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